A Little Bit of My Story…
Claire Casey
Every relationship faces challenges.
Somehow many of us start out thinking “But that won’t happen to me.” Whether it’s temptations, cheating, a distant man, sexual problems, unsupportive family or friends, divorce, or unexpected changes in your health or job or finances…
What happens when something shakes up your perfect little world like an angry toddler shakes a snow globe? And what happens when that shaken-up little world gets thrown to the ground and stomped on?
The secret to a wildly successful relationship is in learning to
- expect challenges, and
- build the kind of relationship that can successfully navigate – and even grow – from them.
That’s what my story is about.
The sparkly little fantasy in my head
I had a mostly ordinary dating life, but when I got married, I somehow believed that those crazy ups and downs of dating were over forever. That the two of us, now that we’d found and committed to each other, were together forever, smooth sailing and clear skies ahead.
I hope you laughed, or at least smiled. 🙂
I don’t know how that sparkly little fantasy got into my brain, but as you can imagine, I was in for a surprise. A bunch of them, actually. But the little bumps and troubles along the way were manageable for the first few years. It wasn’t until we hit a massive pocket of stress turbulence that my marriage had its first real test.
How we got hit by the oldest cliché ever
The two of us nearly divorced over “the seven year itch.” You know why that’s such a worn-out cliché? Because it has so much truth in it, that’s why.
We were primed for it because during our seventh year of marriage because we
moved to a new place (where we didn’t know anyone),
changed jobs, and
we found out we were expecting our first baby.
When you’re under that much stress, something just may break. And that “something” was almost my marriage.
3 signs I ignored or didn’t give enough attention to
There are lots of signs that your partner is cheating or tempted to cheat. We certainly had many of them, but my “it wouldn’t happen to us” mindset was preventing me from paying attention.
These are the top signs that should have let me know my man was starting to drift…
- Our sex life was waaaay off
- There was a lot of secretive behavior on his part
- He was spending a lot of time with my girlfriend
That first one is ALWAYS a clue that something in the relationship is off-kilter. The second one I called “crossed wires” at first. He was forever late or not where he was supposed to be, he had frequent excuses for being gone for hours when he should have been gone only minutes, things like that. Later I learned that secretive behavior is a good way to know an affair (emotional or otherwise) may be happening.
Of course, it all came to a head one day, and my perfect little snowglobe world got thrown violently to the concrete floor.
Fortunately for me and my marriage, I had Ruth…
Everyone should have a savvy girlfriend who KNOWS about relationships
To this day, I credit my marvelous girlfriend Ruth with saving our marriage.
When my husband came to tell me what was going on between him and the other woman, it was Ruth who stepped in to help us.
Ruth hugged me, dried my tears, sat me down (and later talked with my husband, too) and told me I needed to do two things:
Decide what I wanted (my marriage – and I had to figure out exactly what that marriage would look like – or a divorce)
Educate myself about men, women, and relationships
She also told me it was time to learn everything I could about how to build my self-esteem and become the kind of independent, powerful, and beautiful woman I am today.
If anyone really is responsible for what I learned over the next few years and what eventually became Capture His Heart, it was Ruth. (Thanks again, Ruth. I love you!)
The happy ending
My husband and I did decide. We decided to choose each other. We packed up and moved to a new place and settled into raising our baby and and carefully rebuilding our relationship. It wasn’t easy or trouble-free, but we were determined and we did it. Ruth continued to guide us, and we grew our network of support so that we would never again be so isolated or alone.
As I write this, we have three wonderful boys at home, and a marriage that is daily better and stronger than ever before.
I wish that during our first 7 years together I had been smarter, but now I am. And now I can share what I have learned about understanding men and becoming the kind of woman a man would fight to win and treasure for the rest of his life.
You deserve a life of diamond-bright love
Finding the love of a lifetime doesn’t “just happen” on it’s own. Over the years I’ve learned so many secret paths, special practices, and soul-deep truths about capturing a man’s heart, and I’m so happy to get to share them with you.
I hope you’ll treasure this journey like I have, and finally start to receive the love you’ve longed for and truly deserve. I hope you become the woman you’re meant to be; one who believes in herself, shines with the light of a dozen suns, and attracts the deeply pleasurable attention of the man destined to hold you in his arms forever.
Thanks for listening to my story. Let’s begin!
